Should you lecture or cheer up?
When some of those around us fail at something or disappoint us, we tend to rush to tell them how they should have done, how dumb they have been, or how disappointed we are. But is this the right moment to judge and criticize? Right after someone has been beaten and is probably unhappy with themselves?
⏬ This week´s card is about the need for a clear distinction between a time to lecture Someone and a time to cheer them up or give them a hand.
Regardless of our roles and relationships (as parents, friends, bosses), we tend to lecture those around us when they fail at something by telling others what they were supposed to do how they were supposed to act or behave.
Not bearing in mind that those who failed are disappointed and going through discomfort. All they need is a helping hand, not a speech from “Mr. knows everything better” that will only make them feel more miserable.
Yes, one must confront the truth; this is no “look to the other side” advice. But first, let them get on their feet to deal with their supposed failure and listen attentively to your advice.
✅ They failed? Please don’t call them losers; encourage them to keep going and give it another try
✅ Someone disappointed you on your expectations about/for them? Maybe it’s time to review your expectation towards others?
✅ It’s elementary to judge and criticize those who have been in the arena. But the credit, even if for a seeming failure, is on them, not the critic.
⏩ Next time Someone fails, give them a hand before you give them a lecture
